Blind Swaps + Profile Checking

What is a Blind Swap or Sender's Choice?

That's when a swap is fulfilled without checking the other person's profile. For example, a 'true' Blind Swap might be 1oz of paper-only goods, which you can fill in advance, tape shut, and later put an address on. Sender's Choice is another term for a Blind Swap. 

When it's "Sender's Choice" I still try to check profiles in case of something offensive, which I generally don't do for Blind swaps. You might really, really hate red, or be lowkey devastated about Valentine's Day because of some Thing that happened. So I'll avoid those things. Otherwise, anything goes.

This means if you don't get things you like, that is a risk of a Blind Swap. Blind Swaps are not rated according to you getting things you like. They are rated according to whether the swap fit requirements. 

If the swap guidelines SAID four types of patterned washi, all 24" or longer, and you got 3 patterned washi and 1 plain, that is not the agreement.

Profile-based Swaps

This means you read your partner's profile carefully and tailour the swap to them.

You must meet all requirements of the swap but ALSO make sure every item included fits their "likes."

This underscores why having a profile tailoured to Swap-Bot is important! I can't send you something you like if you sign up for a handmade notecard swap but only list movies and stuff in your profile! 

Also, I don't want to set swappers up for failure if I host. If I'm hosting a papercrafts swap and I check your comments and ratings, and notice that you have absolutely nothing related to favourite motifs or colours or ANYTHING, how is someone supposed to trade with you and know that they're sending something you'll want?

A profile-based swap is rating on TWO counts:
- does the swap fit the guidelines stated?
- does the swap fit your profile? That means nothing on your Dislikes/"can't have" list.

Fitting your profile IS part of the guidelines of a profile-based swap. 

 

If your swap did not meet requirements, you can first contact the person for a resend (which is fair) and rate accordingly. Ratings can always change.

Underage Swappers

Swap-bot.com is only open to users who are 18+. If you see a user that is not 18, please report it. You can also list them here.

The minimum age on SB is 18. Yes, even if you are an adult in your country. Yes, EVEN if you have your parent's permission. Yes, even if you simply at 2 to your birth year to make you 18 when you sign up. You know you aren't 18 or older, even if other's don't.

It's not about "I'm old enough to send some postcards about a favourite book. They're not going to know I'm not actually 18." 

It's about being disrespectful of the rules the site owners and builders set. 

It's also abuse of trust. If someone *believes* they are sending mail to an adult and they aren't, we're the ones who get in trouble. Not you. 

If you are 17 and sign up for an ATC swap that features any kind of "adult content," even any kind of no-nudity graveure photos, that means everyone consents to sending mail to other ADULTS. No one consented to send mail to someone under 18. Even if you are an adult in your country, that is not the point. The point is that no one consented to send you mail. 

Even if you sign up for the most innocuous, stupid swap to send a postcard about your dog, it literally does not matter because no one consented to send mail to someone under 18.

There are other ways to find penpals and to exchange mail with people OFF of Swap-bot. No one is really in charge of you sending mail lol. You think I cared at 16? hahahahhaha no. 

At 14, I was more worried about making sure DCF didn't show up and whether my CPR skills were good enough than I was if someone didn't like a book I mailed to someone. And that was the 2000s. If anyone "gets it," it's me. Consent and respect are the most important things we can show to strangers in this stupid thing called society. They are the foundations of all the other stuff we need and want.

If you see other people's profiles and they say to send mail to their 9 year old, that is an ADULT who is consenting to mail for THEIR 9 year old. Presumably, that adult is going to take responsibility for that inbound mail and screen it for their child. Then they are the ones who deal with the child's emotions, whatever they are, towards that mail.

It's like how technically, you can get a credit card with your name on it BUT someone who is over 18 has to sign the consent forms and take responsibility for whatever happens. 

It is not the same as a teenager who is trying to sign up for adult rules on their own. If you can't even legally sign up for a $200 credit card in the States, you cannot use Swap-bot. Please just wait a bit.

One account for mail ideas and how to find swaps + penpals is MochiBujo. I watch this account a lot because I like the aesthetics and she makes short videos on lots of topics. You will likely find other accounts and check for penpals on Instagram. I can't tell anyone what to do really. I'm just advising you that underage swappers are not allowed on Swap-bot.com .

Flakers + Ratings

"Flakers" are people who sign up for a swap and don't send their end of the bargain. 

Often, these people don't reply to messages. IF you leave a poor rating, they MIGHT respond to it- but only because of public image. They rely on others agreeing that it was Just a Mistake!1! and to feel bad for the flaker when the Mean, Bad Swapper left a Negative Rating for them. ... oy. 

Have you ever seen that tactic? It has a name.

Image: DARVO statement examples
from Ray Family Therapy

That example is a form of DARVO, and it's super-common.

“DARVO is an acronym that stands for Deny, Attack, and Reverse Victim Offender. It describes a manipulative tactic often used by abusers to avoid taking responsibility for their actions and shift the blame onto their victims.” - Avigail Lev, PsyD, founder of Bay Area CBT Center and CBTonline.

Most people think of DARVO in context of abusive domestic relationships. Thing is, this social tactic is only practiced IN those relationships because the perpetrator has gotten comfortable using it with everything else. Often, the perpetrator isn't even aware that this is a form of abuse... It's probably even normal for them to experience from someone else! But 'normal' is not the same as 'healthy.' DARVO is normal, and normalized. And when it's small, like a stupid envelope of paper, it doesn't really matter right?

But it does. It does when you are the one leaving the honest negative rating for a swap that factually never arrived, on a swapper that you factually DID message, and factually never got back a response. It does when you're essentially getting bullied or silenced because you don't want to look like the Bad Guy when in actuality, they're the Bad Guy. Backing down lets bad people escape consequences.

Most people do the things they do, both positive and negative, because it has worked in their favour before. Whatever their personal values equate as "favourable" to themselves, a thing that works should keep working. Behaviour isn't random, even if it LOOKS like it on the outside. Learning this will help you with every single person you ever meet- it isn't just for a stupid mail site!

DARVO tactics are a demonstrable public ability to twist things around on strangers, to the approval of other strangers. And if those strangers "approve," it's not REALLY a Bad Thing, is it? And if the victim (the bad rater) breaks down and feels bad and changes the rating, that's further reinforcement that THEY didn't do anything wrong- the bad rater was a mean person for rating bad. Factually, the bad rating was a FAIR rating because the swap never arrived and the person never responded to messages, but public opinion is what dictates right/wrong. The wrongness isn't in the flaking, it's in whether they get punished for it. And the flaker feels like they do NOT deserve punishment. They have "Reasons!" (All of which are important and valid to them, with a lack of regard towards others.)

Being raised by a clinical narcissist (not the buzzword kind all over TikTok, the DSM kind) I've learned to make things as transparent as possible while attempting to protect certain information. It's a weird balance that's taken 20 years to kind-of figure out. The internet wasn't that big when I was a teen so there weren't hundreds of people better educated and more experienced than me to exchange tactics and psychology. Most of you, hopefully, will never ever need to be this level of on-guard! But I do have to say that it's taught me a LOT about "CYA policies," how law works, and how people generally behave (both positive and negative.) Most people are actually quite good, or they're trying to be much better people. Even people who have really bad habits (often) don't want to be harmful. Here's the problem: my name is not followed by PhD, LMHC, or MD. Chances are, yours isn't either. If it is, you probably are not some random person's therapist. 

On Swap-bot, we are here to trade letters and craft supplies. No one is here to be your doctor or mine. You cannot fix someone who twists stuff all around on you.

This is a guide to asking yourself how to handle a problem user: What to do if someone is rude to me on Swap-bot?

This is why I say to leave comments publicly on a profile. The catch is that the user can delete your comment on their profile. 

It's also why I save all messages until they are no longer relevant and keep open communication with Group Admins. Keep your messages and if problems arise, like someone demanding you change ratings or berating you in messages or forums, screencap it and e-mail it to yourself to keep the timestamps. 

If you are being harassed or threatened via Snail Mail, that is a federal crime. Even if you don't think that person is "actually serious" or capable of carrying out the threat, the reason that person feels so comfortable SENDING threats is because no one has sufficiently held them accountable.

"Keep any letter that attempts to scare, threaten or extort you in any way, and report it to the Postal Inspection Service by calling 1-877-876-2455. If you or anyone you know is being bullied, online or in person, tell a trusted friend or a loved one."

Public ratings are extremely important to keep everyone appraised of great swappers AND flakers/double profilers/unreliable swappers.

Sometimes, a late swap or a swap not showing is just a thing that happens with USPS. None of us control that. It sucks. But that's why it's so important to do some due diligence before assuming someone has flaked on you. Not everyone is signed up to get an e-mail if you send a message. 

But if you HAVE taken these steps and someone is MOST LIKELY a flaker, giving them a low rating is appropriate and important to protect the SB community. 

Don't worry about any backlash for doing what is correct and fair. Most users stick up for each other. We don't want to be the next person to fall for it.

You can also list that flaker here, and if you like, leave a short note about any retaliation you received.

Making, Decorating, and Reusing Envelopes

Decorated Envelopes

"Decorated Envelopes" are envelopes with any amount of decoration or art on them.

You can see examples of decorated envelopes on my Instagram. I don't post nearly all of the ones I've made, of course. There are probably 50 or so on my shelf right now, not including all the dozens I've sent out this year. 

Decorating an envelope is usually not required in swaps for good reason.

Any decorations, like these stickers, washi, or paper scraps, must be covered with clear packing tape before mailing. Stamped images are ink, of course, and do not have to be taped over because no small little pieces can lift or come off during the mailing/machining process. 

Most people are NOT going to save your envelopes. Do you save the envelopes of every piece of mail you've ever gotten? Right. So putting forth the effort and hours of time to decorate them nicely isn't worth it to the vast majority of people, sending OR receiving.

Then why do any of us bother?

Eh, I'm sure everyone has their own reasons.

Some people have a particular style of "happy mail" or "penpal mail," where the envelope is part of the gift of mail. The letters are personal and caring, not a "one-way communication" like "favourite book" or "top 10 songs." They often include some handmade items like small art, ephemera folios, etc. These decorated envelopes are put into an outer, plain envelope. 

If penpalling is your favourite, check out MochiBujo and MihosHappyLife video blogs (vlogs.)

I do it because that initial "happy brain chemical" boost of interest and excitement when something comes in the mail and it don't look like a bill, so maybe other people get that little boost, too. I know my long-term post office worker (in the actual office, not a carrier) things mail art is fun- as long as it's properly secured to not mess up the machines. Which mostly just chews up your mail, a lose-lose situation. Just like me, it's nice to not just have endless blank white envelopes back and forth.

I also like decorating envelopes because they are 'transient art' and I don't need to make each one "perfect." It's going to be out the door and it isn't something that someone is going to keep, so I don't need to make the most perfect item with the best materials and the most practiced techniques... I can just experiment with colour and use what I have to put together a theme. 

Most of my envelopes are coordinated with the stamp. For example, the Toni Morrison stamps coordinate with bees because of some of her famous writings. The bee motif also matches the yellow used in the stamp itself. The George Morrison stamps are abstract artworks with lots of colour in them which frees up the motifs to be whatever I like. The envelopes sometimes imitate colour 'layering,' where colours occur in the stamp. They may imitate shape or 'rhythm' of the composition. Right now I'm mostly using up my Chief Standing Bear, Vanishing Species (tigers,) and fox stamps. Foxes are only $.40 and a letter is $.66, so it's a mix of foxes, blueberries, pears, and lemons or lamps. More stamps add visual interest to some envelopes and some people collect used stamps, so I try to send those envelopes to people who have that in their profile. 

I can buy boxes of envelopes in either brown or mixes of colours online very easily but for swaps that don't involve notecards, I really like hitting up thrift stores. Thrift stores here often have small bags of mixed cards and envelopes for only $1-2. It's a great source of envelopes (and cards) if I don't want to buy them. These bags are often very new and clean! People just declutter and don't know what anyone would do with them, so they donate them. Cool! I usually pick up stacks of Xmas postcards this time of year and write them as "Mrs. Claus" to kids. They come bundled with blank envelopes so it's perfect.

There's another way to make mail more fun.

Handmade Envelopes: What to Use?

People can make envelopes out of just about anything.

Do you have some junk mail sturdy enough for the post process, like the letter "inviting you" to get a credit card? Have some acrylic paint laying around? Tape down some newspaper junk mail and paint over that paper, or invite your kids to paint! That piece of paper can be folded into an envelope. There are lots of tutorials for the folding. Just fill it up and tape it shut!

Some people reuse the glossy calendar pages or thicker magazine pages to make interesting envelopes. As long as the paper used is of a quality that can be machined without tearing, it's fine. The thin grocery advertisement paper would not be useful, but the glossy thicker rental furniture ad would probably be fine. 

I also use up any scrapbook paper I really don't care for. I bought a stack of 8.5" x 11" for all of 20 designs but that has 100 sheets... and you buy it all, or get none. I use PAPER and not cardstock because the weight of cardstock is much more durable for mailing BUT mail has a weight limit. 1 stamp = 1 ounce. The more the envelope weighs, the less you can put in for a swap. Scrapbook paper is a perfect material. It's already patterned and stands out, AND really what are you using it for?

Handmade Envelopes: Actually Making Them

There are a couple ways to go about making your envelopes, some easier and some harder.

Many people use templates. You can download a template or template pack (which may cost a few dollars for someone else's labour and time to collect the templates in one easy to use pack, a very fair price.) 

You can take an envelope you like and carefully take it apart. A hair dryer on low heat can loosen the adhesive if it's difficult. From here, use a piece of cardstock or pattern plastic to trace the paper envelope for a sturdy template of your own. 

I use a mix of templates and the We-R-Makers envelope punch board. There are instructions on the punch board for square envelopes but squares are not machinable. There are measurements for rectangular envelopes, too! Check the chart for all different dimensions and how large your starting piece of paper needs to be. My starting paper is 8.5" x 8.5" for most of my envelope, which comes out to 6.5" x 4.75". We-R-Makers has an assortment of punch boards and a couple of them make envelopes, so look around to see what you might enjoy using.

To close them up, regular glue stick will NOT hold. You need a craft glue stick (stronger adhesive) at minimum. I don't play around and take chances. I'll glue stick the envelope shut to hold it together and then use thin strips of packing tape over the edges, cutting one short piece of thin packing tape into 4 strips.

Reusing Envelopes

Reusing envelopes is a matter of discretion when it comes to Swap-bot. Some users will put it directly in their profiles that they like it when people reuse packaging. Some people do NOT like it. 

In any event, make sure the packaging is not dirty or damaged, so it's not snagged, torn up, needs a bunch of tape to hold it together, etc. Also make sure your packaging does not have any barcodes or QR codes on it, or any symbols indicating a hazard like batteries or liquids. Even though it's clearly an old Amazon box or something, those markings can mean USPS won't ship your item. You must black them out sufficiently. I just use duct tape and be done with it.

Those envelopes might be fine for sending ebay items or something to a family member... but sometimes you just need to throw things away. 

Remember that Boeing runs empty flights using hundreds of gallons of petrol and tonnes, tonnes of carbon emissions *every day*... but thank god I feel so guilty about waste that I saved my soda can for recycling next time I drive ten miles out to my mom's house, where her part of the city HAS recycling. Somebody's gotta keep eight empty boxes in their living room otherwise they might fill up the landfills. 

I'm not saying that we should just rampantly consume and waste whenever we want. Of *course* not. But I am saying that there's only so much random individuals can be responsible for and there's only so much each of us can reasonably do before it becomes harmful to us- like stacking up piles and piles of mail and cardboard and attracting roaches into our homes to avoid landfills. It just makes our residences into a landfill. 

Reuse the box or the envelope! Please do! But also know when the purpose of the package has been served, and when to let it go.

Low or Neutral Ratings (1 or 3)

A low or neutral rating is something that can always be amended.

Here are my thoughts on what 5, 3, and 1 mean.

Whether leaving a low rating or responding to a rating, it is extremely important to leave any kind of personal comments out of the rating.

I don't care if you think the person is the worst person on the planet, worse than the Deepwater Horizon guys who actively knew about the problem and decided to sacrifice lives and our planet anyways. Leave all that out of it. These ratings need to be factual.

When leaving a neutral or negative rating, please do not just leave a number. It is not helpful to other swappers, to hosts, or to the person you left the rating for. 

Communication is key!

If you leave a 3 or 1, let them know what happened. Did this person misspell your name or send offensive items in a swap that was specifically profile-based? That is an honest rating and a valuable one. It shows that a person did not pay attention to the requirements of the swap and was disrespectful. It wasn't important enough to consider you and your stated values, compared to the desire to stuff an envelope full of Things and send it out. 

Say specifically what happened. 

"The deadline was Sept. 10th but the postmark is Sept. 20th" (see about postmarks)
"The item arrived with only 3 items inside when 5 was the minimum." 

When leaving the initial rating, the date will be shown.

If you receive a 3 or 1

You can leave a return comment. These are public. This is not a space to attack the other person's character or insult someone. I know emotions can run high and both of you feel hurt. Keep it factual and respond to the comment left. You must also leave a date on the response. It isn't on some kind of form and SB won't automatically tag a date/time. You need to leave one.

"9/23/23 - You are correct, I sent the swap late and forgot to message you about it. I am so sorry!"
"9/26/23- I apologise that the swap was not up to requirements. Please let me review the swap and send another (complete) swap by (exact date.) Thank you."

After that, you must ABSOLUTELY FOLLOW UP. Do what you say you are going to do.

Amending swap ratings

If you amend a swap rating, you should be able to update your comment. Please add the date you amended it. SB may not show it accurately. 

It's a nice idea to update your comments above the original line to show that yes, this or that happened, but the user has taken appropriate steps to correct it. Therefore, they are a trustworthy user and even when mistakes happen, they will make it right to the best of their ability. It is a nice idea to compliment the person on something specific you liked. We all like compliments, right?

"10/8/23 - Thank you for resending the swap! I especially liked the flower stickers."

Please be kind to each other but ALSO be aware that giving out 5s and Hearts because you want to avoid conflict actually harms people. 

Swap-bot is a good training ground to weed out people-pleasing behaviours that actually cause conflict, miscommunication, and anxiety. What is someone really going to do if you leave a flaker an accurate 1 rating? Nothing. You can feel the anxiety and also do the fair thing. Practice makes perfect, and that's what this is: practice. Holding someone accountable for something like a poor swap is practice in standing up for yourself and what you agreed to.

Swappers are looking to swap with trustworthy users. If you don't leave honest ratings, hosts won't know that the person is a "problem swapper." I cannot drop someone who joined my swaps because I don't know that what they're going to send (IF they mail anything at all) is substandard, dirty, reeks of smoke, is full of MLM spam, whatever. 

Hosts NEED swappers to rate fairly and to handle issues like lost swaps and resends with grace. It makes our community better. I don't have to worry about banning from swaps for reasons of low ratings or worry that something will go wrong. We wouldn't be here if this wasn't a great community! None of us get paid to be on Swap-bot! We're here because it's fun. SO let's keep it fun and safe for everyone.

If you are being harassed or threatened via Snail Mail, that is a federal crime. Even if you don't think that person is "actually serious" or capable of carrying out the threat, the reason that person feels so comfortable SENDING threats is because no one has sufficiently held them accountable.

"Keep any letter that attempts to scare, threaten or extort you in any way, and report it to the Postal Inspection Service by calling 1-877-876-2455. If you or anyone you know is being bullied, online or in person, tell a trusted friend or a loved one."

The Importance of Addresses

Addresses are of utmost importance on Swap-bot.

You might be amazed how many people do NOT have their address correct or formatted properly. No one needs to google search how to properly send your mail. Put your address into SB the correct way: the way it is written when someone sends you mail. That is what it's there for.

This is an example of how to write an address in the United States.

Image: Guide to writing a US address. Source: UConn CISS

Name

Line 1: Your name
Line 2 (optional): Your business name, care-of C/O name, etc.

You might also be (not) impressed by how many people gloss over names and assume a name is spelled a certain way. It isn't a matter of dyslexia, although that DOES happen- a LOT. If the name is "unusual" a person may spell it just however, or assign you a nickname, or any other manner of disrespectful things. Some "name issues" might be that someone's name does not follow the rules of YOUR language. Some people don't care about 'minor' stuff like 'van Daer' vs. 'Vandaer' or 'Van Dear.' Some people very much do. 

The name is posted in the address section for a reason. Assume that the person who typed in their own name knows how they want their name to be spelled out. I don't even care if that person's name has a 2 in it, y'all better write na2me. 

Why their name got a 2? Ain't your business. You ain't gotta ask all kinds of questions. Their name is not up for your approval, and if you wanna to protest about that, message someone else because I am not the One. Just write it down how it say and we'll all be good.

Street Address

Line 3: Number of street, street name, your apartment or unit number.

Some address forms ask for your unit or apartment as a separate line. Swap-bot does not and USPS does not require it. Please include your apartment or unit number in the line with the street number and address.

City/State/Zip

Line 4: City, State Abbreviation Zip (+4, IF you know it for sure.)

USE YOUR STATE ABBREVIATION. Do not write the full name of the state! This makes it harder to send you mail because every sender has to look up your state's abbreviation. This is especially hard on international senders. 

No one writes the full name of the state in the address on an envelope. The address section on SB is explicitly to be used to send you mail, so write it exactly the way it needs to be on the envelope sent to you.

Country

It's a complaint that is well-founded: Americans, in particular, do not put our country on mail sent internationally. 

Some of us remember but our address labels are automatically printed without country and many of us forget to write it when using them. Or we forget to hand-write it. We just assume that we're Special or something and that the post office will see the State line and know it's from us. And often, they do. We're just so entitled that way, we take advantage of it. Courtesy, people! Respect!

It is not hard to write the country of origin on international mail. If you put the international stamp on the envelope, make sure that USA is at the bottom of the return address, too.

If you are not in the US:

Please ensure your address is put in how it should be mailed to you, regardless of how Swap-bot wants it formatted. 

Addressing your mail:

If you do not have great handwriting or you have any reason to think your writing won't be seen well or understood, please type it and tape it to the item. Taping over the piece of paper with the address keeps rain or damage from affecting the address.

Return Addresses:

Sometimes USPS makes a mistake. The address you wrote down from SB actually IS correct- or maybe it isn't, but the swapper typed it in wrong. YOU wrote down exactly what they put! Sometimes everything really IS right but it got sent back. Maybe it rained and ruined the address *just enough* that now it can't be delivered!

But these mailpieces can only be sent back if there's a return address on the envelope. Put your address on every piece of mail whenever possible.

Leaving Ratings is Important!

Leaving a rating for each swap is IMPORTANT.

The rating system would not exist if there was no reason for it. Joining a swap is about trading stuff but it is ALSO about being shown as a good swapper.

A good swapper is one who is timely and sends before/by the deadline, sends items that are called for in the swap, and who puts effort into making right any issues that arise (like late or damaged mail that affects the swap contents.) 

But a person can't prove that they are consistently a good swapper if the ratings don't reflect that!

What do the ratings/numbers each mean and how do I decide? What if my swap arrived dirty or damaged?

People WANT your feedback and it is part of the agreement to join in a swap.

Some people pay more attention to ratings they get than others. For some of us, receiving ratings in a timely fashion (or at all) is lower priority, but for some people- ESPECIALLY NEW PEOPLE WHO RELY ON THOSE RATINGS TO JOIN SWAPS- the rating is high priority. 

If you sign up for a swap, you also agree to rate on swaps received.  

Not leaving a rating is considered rude. Please keep Swap-bot fun and friendly!

Leave ratings soon after receiving a swap

Please be respectful and keep SB a fun place by rating swaps when you get them. I usually can't do it same-day but I try to do so within 3 calendar days. Any longer and initial impressions wear off, or I might forget that I got the swap. 

Thanks, fibro fog. Always a joy.

Keeping things straight

It's a very good idea to keep the entire swap contents intact before you rate.

That means if it's a postcard, it's self-contained. A postcard is one piece, right? But a 1oz swap has many pieces and the envelope tells me who it came from. I can't rate accurately if I take two of those apart, sort out what I like/don't like, and then forget who sent me the cool washi tape and who sent me the torn-up book page. I do open the swaps when I get them! It's fun and I'm impatient. :P But all the items go back into the envelope until they are rated.

I like to have one dollar tree organising bin, like the pencil organiser kind, for Swap-bot mail. It's close-bottomed and very small so if anything falls out of an envelope, it's fine. When it's rated, it can come out of that bin. Maybe you'd like a system like that, too. Or maybe you have one already!

Has it been a few weeks and you have not been rated yet?

Check out the post on missing/late mail. Maybe the swap just hasn't arrived (yet.) Ask for a rating on that swap. Give a few days for response, especially so they can check to see if they got it.

Did you leave/receive a neutral or negative rating? Let's talk about it.

"Angel" Swaps + Hosts

From the Swap-bot.com Help FAQ:

What is a 'swap angel' or 'angeling'?

An 'angel' is someone who volunteers to send swap items to a person in a swap who did not receive anything from their assigned partner. Being an angel is a very nice thing to do, but Swap-bot does not officially support the practice. Many people get very frustrated when they are 'flaked' on in swaps and angels fix that, but they can also be the target for dishonest users who are trying to get free items in the mail. It is up to each individual to decide whether they would like to volunteer as an angel and it is certainly never required.

---------

Angel-ing a swap is NOT required of a host. 

It is optional.

Many hosts consider it to be proper etiquette and a responsibility to offer angel-ing for anyone who gets a swap flaked on. So if I host a swap, I am prepared to 'make it right' if someone does not send you the swap. 

My opinion is that I set up the ability for people to agree to a contract, and if a third party breaks that contract, I should fulfill the agreement. It's just as if you lend money to someone, and they have a cosigner, that cosigner would be responsible if the person you loaned money to refused to pay. It gives more leniency in some swaps. This is why I have the guidelines that I do: they are more strict than most users because they consider more than just a 4 or 5 rating.

Not all hosts do that. It may discourage people from flaking. If someone doesn't send a mail item, they get nothing- and some people will be more inclined to send out their end of the bargain. Refusing to angel also tends to make the host much more selective about who joins their swaps. They don't want to become known as a careless host who sets people up for failure and disappointment.

If a host does not angel, it should be stated in the swap listing... but that again is at the discretion of the host. A host may not say that.

If you don't know whether a host angels and you are worried about a partner flaking on you, please politely ask the host what their stance is. Make sure to directly message them. We do NOT get notifications on swap comments!

Another user may also angel a swap! Some forum threads in the general forums and in groups will have a list of flaked swaps and requests for angels. 

Please also leave a comment on the profile of the person who sent you an angel-ed swap. This lets us know that a swap arrived safely and tells the readers of our profiles that we're trustworthy swappers.

Be an Active Group Member!

Quite a few of us are in groups or will be in groups. Groups are SB users who all have a common goal or theme, such as "Washi Tape Lovers" or CPG (cheap postage group). 

Image: Lovely Swappers-R-Us Group Page

 

On a group page, there is a title (Lovely Swappers-R-Us), a "theme" (what the group is about,) how old the group is, and in blue, the group forum.

In the body text, the group founders can put in whatever. LSRUS tells about the group in the first paragraph and specifies the group requirements. On the right side is an option to leave the group. I have the option to create swaps in LSRUS. Underneath is the list of Group Swaps, which can only be joined by group members.

Groups are a fun way to find swaps with like-minded people who often have specific ratings or requirements! I don't usually have to put any guidelines for ratings on those because the group rules weed out people to begin with.

Problem is... a LOT of people are NOT active group swap joiners! So there's big groups and few or no swaps ever happening, and if they are started, no one joins.

Part of this is limited ability to invite people to create swaps. It's a big responsibility because one poor host can ruin the reputation of the ENTIRE group. Ability to create swaps is often held tightly to a few original founding people for that reason. The other issue is a feature I didn't even realise existed for a few years! It's e-mail preferences for group swaps.

How to set up e-mail reminders on Group swaps:

Go to profile -> Update Profile -> Groups 

The groups you are part of should each be listed.

Click an option to receive an e-mail for each group. I only have e-mail notifications for group swaps being created. Other people have both options or neither option.

Unless the group admin sends out e-mails to remind people to check their group swaps, you won't see them in the general "Find Swaps" search! And many hosts, I have to tell you, have 'real life' stuff. This is not a job. It takes a lot of effort to host, much less to admin a group and remember to send out various reminders and resolve user disputes and all sorts of things.

Other ways to be an active group member:

Check out the Group Forums!

For the LSRUS example, the Group Forum link is right at the top under the Founded date. The group forum has all kinds of topics and people can start their own, too. The admin puts up a monthly sticky-post topic, meaning it stays at the top, for Wish Lists. There's no official swap set for these. If you have something that someone wants, you are free to send it or not. 

What is in YOUR groups' forums?

Go find out! But make sure to check back because there are no notifications for forum comments. 

Please help keep our groups active by joining a swap now and then. <3

E-mail Preferences, User Alerts, + What Doesn't Alert Us

There are optional e-mail alerts and there are things that don't alert hosts/users at all. It's important to know that some things are not always seen by a host and can't be replied to in-line or in a thread. You aren't being ignored!

Image: Swap-bot.com Email Preferences

Swap-Bot E-mail Preferences

Click "edit profile." Go to the "Preferences" section. It will say "Edit Your Preferences."

This is where you can select which e-mail alerts you receive. I already get a LOT of e-mail, which is overwhelming for me. I only selected to be notified when someone responds to my rating and when someone comments on my profile. Otherwise, I would never see either of those!

SB automatically e-mails me to say "It's time to start swappin'!" and to remind me when a swap I'd signed up for is approaching (even though that looks like an e-mail option that I don't have selected? idk.) 

But you'll see that e-mail options only cover FOUR categories. 

There is another that none of us get e-mails or in-SB alerts for:

Comments on swaps. 

Image: a screenshot of a comment on a swap.

lol check that out. that comment on the bottom of the swap, in the Swap Discussion section?

yeah.

NO ONE is ever gonna get an alert for that. Not the winners of this bonus envelope giveaway, not me (the host,) not anyone.

So if you leave a comment on a swap, there's not much chance someone will see it- or see it *in time* before the swap is assigned!

hahahahhaaaa

please just directly message the host.

one thing: 

If you see spam or bots posting a lot of weird messages, especially with links, or a normal-sounding username but with a comment that has nothing to do with the swap topic, MESSAGE THE HOST. We are the only ones who can delete these comments. And it's very important: the more spam is allowed, the more spam is 'ranked' as important and the more people are exposed to malicious spam and bots.

Help us keep swap-bot safe for everyone!

Commenting on profiles

There are lots of times when you can leave comments on a profile! All you have to do is be logged in, click the profile, and scroll to the bottom-right where it says to leave a comment.

Some great times to leave a comment:

- Someone sent you an Angel'ed swap: let people know that a host made your flaked-on swap right, and let the host know that it arrived! "Angel-ing" means that someone did not send the agreed-on swap so another person sent you an envelope. Generally, most hosts take on the responsibility to angel swaps, but not all do. Please let us know if a swap arrived!

- Someone sent you a Wish or a surprise letter! Again, let them know you received it and thank them. Publicly commenting helps show other users that this sender is trustworthy. A "Wish" is when a group has a Group Forum thread for Wish Lists that are not an arranged swap. If any of us have something on the other person's Wish List, we have the option of mailing it out. 

- You can't rate a 3 or 1 yet, AND you have already messaged someone about a swap not arriving... and that person is in other swaps that might also be flaked. Some hosts read the recent comments, especially in that 2-week gap when ratings aren't available. We can followup with that user to see if they're responsive because if they aren't, and they're signed up for our swap, we can decide if they're going to flake on US, too. See last section on "Late Swap? No Arrival?"

Comments do not send a user alerts unless they are signed up for those. Not everyone is, so if you feel like you need to (like ensuring an item arrived) please message AND comment. One is for private messages, the other is public and can add that reassurance for others.